the-onion-logoEvery now and then you read a mainstream media piece that makes you think The Onion has taken over the news director’s chair.

You know The Onion, right? No? Take a look at this, and, darkly, this.

But today’s story came my way via The Puget Sound Business Journal. Mainstream? Yep.

The headline, though, reveals something of the oddity faced by a state that is flipping the switch on whether something is legal: “Marijuana experience required: WA recruiting experts to advise on legalization.”

As the majority of my high school graduating class sat up and took notice, the article explains:

“Washington is looking to hire experts in the marijuana industry to help the state Liquor Control Board get the tightly regulated state-licensed cannabis business up and running. Voters approved Initiative 502 to legalize, regulate and tax recreational marijuana in November. Since then, the state has issued a request for proposals to hire consultants who can advise the board on the nuances of establishing a successful, well-regulated system.”

Nuances. Uh-huh. I get it.

Washington’s Liquor Control Board is searching for consultants to help it create a legal marijuana industry. One part of the job would be coming up with regulations for edible products containing marijuana, like these available for medical-marijuana patients at CannaPi Consulting dispensary in Seattle. (Puget Sound Business Journal Photo | Anthony Bolante)

Washington’s Liquor Control Board is searching for consultants to help it create a legal marijuana industry. One part of the job would be coming up with regulations for edible products containing marijuana, like these available for medical-marijuana patients at CannaPi Consulting dispensary in Seattle. (Puget Sound Business Journal Photo | Anthony Bolante)

The reporter, Valerie Bauman, must have had some fun with the story, as she continues,

“Officials are hoping to assemble a consulting team that can demonstrate product and industry knowledge, among other skills that would indicate an intimate familiarity with the currently illegal market.”

Adding to the tongue-in-cheek hilarity is the image the newspaper selected: a retail reach-in case that contained snack foods—”munchies,” as we used to say at Arlington High School. The story explains that among the many things that will have to be regulated in the new legal regime will be “edible products containing marijuana.”

I suppose postings like these are what we may see in Arizona eventually. After all, every industry requires industry professionals. And those pros need to arrive with a skill set.

You owe it to yourself to read the entire story here.

A heartfelt hat tip to my colleague Lisa Bormaster for spotting this gnarly story.

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